June 1st, 2003


A rare glimpse into the shady subconscious of game design...

Without having fully regained wakefulness, I have decided to share with you, dear readers, the dream I just had.

It seems that I was in the eleventh hour of working on a computer game. Myself and several of my coworkers were blowing off some steam late at night on a grassy hillside, and for some reason, we had a stuffed bear which represented our main character. This bear was named 'Bob', and he had baggy jeans, a white t-shirt, perhaps a denim jacket, and - this was important - an irregularly shaped bag of brown sugar.

I remember throwing the bear at our art lead, and hitting him on the head, and before long one of the guys was drop-kicking this guy across the wide field we were in. One drop-kick too many, it seemed, because the brown sugar didn't survive.

Because of the catastrophic loss of our bag of brown sugar, we had to scale back the design of our game, and though I don't recall what the original design was, the scaled back design had to be called "Bob, The Thumbless Freak", in which you had to run around in front of a diabled bear in a white t-shirt, opening doors for him. I'm not sure how awake I was when I realized that the one challenge in the game would come in the last few doors when opening the wrong door would expose Bob to the flames of a blast furnace.

Nobody do anything sneaky and take this game design and beat me to market, now. This is my intellectual property, so stay back!

I don't want to hear any well-meant analyses of the meaning of this dream. The game I'm working on in real life is going FINE. Really.
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