July 16th, 2003


I told you so. Well, not *you*.

So, I've been busy. This isn't unusual for me. People ask me "whatcha been up to?" and I groan, and I say "work". And it doesn't matter where I'm working, this is something that I keep doing over and over again.

You'd think I'd learn.

But that's not what I came here to say. I mean, yes, it does address the unformed question in the back of your head "didn't I know some guy who occasionally used to post something here? What was his name again?", but really it leads me into a variation on the theme that thankfully (sorta) happened to someone else.

So, let me back up some and tell my story (because even when I'm telling a story about somebody else, I have to make it about me). A while ago, I was working at a games company. To protect the guilty, I'll just call it "One Huge Stone Entertainment". I was pressed into service on a game that sounded kind of cool at the time, but even at first I had my misgivings. Let's call it "Massively Huge Game Project". Blah blah blah, mismanagement, blah, frustration, blah, 'Dave, we need the following Big Huge System working in six weeks' (wasn't somebody else scheduled to work on that six months ago?). I burned out on the project, and have been working on a smaller project since then, and for the most part have been happy.

The only misgivings that I have had have been about leaving my friends high and dry in my absence.

So, yesterday, I got an email from a friend who is still in the clutches of One Huge Stone, still being crushed under the wheels of the Massively Huge Game Project. He asked (for a "friend") whether there were any job openings that I knew about.

I was happy, I was sad, I was sad, I was... no, that's about it. I was sad to see that things had got worse. I was sad that I couldn't help him. But some small part of me (not as small as I'd like, though) was smug to realize that the fate that I expected to befall the project was in fact happening.

Aside: I just saw T3. John Connors talks about doing something noble after something terrible happened. I'm kind of the reverse. I did something self-serving (quitting my job) before things went from bad to worse. I fostered a hope that more of my coworkers would have left at the same time as me, but it doesn't seem like that happened.

Anyway, I sent my poor friend an email saying that I wish that I could help, and he replied that he was actually in a better mood, and that he wasn't contemplating quitting anymore. Er, that is his "friend" wasn't contemplating quitting. Of course.

I hope that the project doesn't crush the souls of any more of my friends.

Survivor's guilt, anyone?